Hey there creator,
An interesting question was posed to me this week: 💭
"If you hit a major setback in life, how do you know if you should “power through” and persevere...
Or if you should take it as a sign from the Universe to let go and move on?"
This question was asked in a webinar I was in on "Building Extreme Resilience" with author and business school professor Srikumar Rao.
If you don't know anything about Rao, he's known as America’s ‘Business Buddha’ in which he applies ancient Eastern philosophy and spiritual teachings to modern ideas like goal-setting, motivation, and business.
So I was expecting him to explain his point by telling some ancient parable or old tale that he's famous for...
Instead, his answer was quite simple yet blew me away... ⚡
❝ Ask yourself who is the person you want to be?
You want to be a person who is calm, serene, grateful for the many things in your life, and willing to work hard to transform in the areas where your preferences are not being met.
Think about who you want to be and then pour your emotional energy into that being. In other words, be the person you want to be.
Now ask yourself what this person you envision would do in this situation. And the answer will pop out easily.
You may decide to remain and try harder. You may decide to move on and let go.
Either way, it doesn’t matter because the great truth to ponder is:
Who you are being is much more important than what you are doing. ❞
// 7 Lessons To Build Extreme Resilience :: 💪
by Srikumar Rao
- Stress appears in our life when we let our expectations or goals get in the way of the Now.
Happiness isn’t delivered in a job, or achievement, or age, or material possession. It’s not delivered by someone new you meet or a friend or a magic lottery ticket. It can only come from within. This is the "I'll be happy when" syndrome. "When" never comes because we always have our sights on wanting something more.
- Effort and will does NOT create lasting behavioral change.
It only creates dissonance, pain, and unpleasant side effects from going “cold turkey.” But when you examine your deeply-rooted beliefs about yourself and how you think the world should function, then you literally become a different person. Better habits are the natural byproduct as you better your mind.
- The best cure isn’t to wish for a different life for yourself but to learn to be grateful for what you already have.
When you intentionally choose to appreciate what you have in life, it makes it really hard to stay in states that don’t serve you, like frustration, disappointment, or anger. Inevitably, there is always something to be grateful for.
- Inspiring others isn't a real goal, it’s a byproduct of elevating your consciousness.
Learn how to direct your mind and your behaviors in a way that inspires others. Find what (or who) inspires you, remember what you’re grateful for, and lead by example. Only after you’ve worked on yourself will you be able to lead others.
- Avoid labeling things as good or bad.
Events happen, and we can’t control those outside forces BUT we have the power to choose our reaction. Accept the darkness and proactively move yourself into the light. Our happiness, success, and ultimately our lives are much more dependent on the attitudes we bring to life rather than the events themselves.
- Accept that unpleasant situations are par for the course especially ones that persist for long periods of time.
No matter how much you grow or how happy you are, you will find yourself in situations that are uncomfortable and unpleasant. Most of us will work for a boss we can't stand at some point in our lives. We have to learn to cope with these situations and we can do that by viewing these experiences as vehicles for our growth.
- Happiness is closer to us than our own skin.
Eternal happiness is always inside of us. And there is nothing we have to do, nothing we have to buy, and no one we have to be. Our minds are conditioned to distract us from this joy, but when you find purpose, meaning, and appreciation in whatever you’re doing, that joy will follow. And when you connect with it, you'll realize the full beauty of your experience — which is really the point of life.
// Goal-Setting Tips & Inspiration :: 🏆
Done is Better Than Perfect.
A few months ago, I took the Fear Assessment developed by Ruth Soukup to find out which fear archetype I was and it revealed that I was the archetype of "The Procrastinator" which really is about being most afraid to make a mistake.
It's having a perfectionist mindset. This can be a hindrance when you want to take action on a goal but resist getting started because you are looking for "everything to be just right", having "all your ducks in a row."
This also can prevent us from completing a goal or project because we are endlessly tweaking and obsessing over it being "just perfect".
👉 When tackling your goals instead of aiming for perfect (or even great), aim for just getting it DONE and make tiny improvements along the way.
These improvements will eventually compound, leading to massive changes over the long term. It’s better to exercise for ten minutes everyday than not at all because you don't have a gym membership or all the proper equipment; it’s better to read one page everyday than never open a book because you know you’re a slow reader. Over the long run, incremental improvements are more impactful than big, unattainable jumps.
In Case You Missed It:
"What is My Purpose"
A few weeks ago I wrote about the idea of "finding your purpose." This week I created a short video about how we tend to idealize and overcomplicate the question of "what is my purpose" — along with some new ways to think about purpose so you can start tapping into it.
Thanks for reading.
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As Always, Keep Creating,
Anthony V. Lombardo
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